goin' CRAZY

"When I fell to the floor tonight, I was so scared, I was so terrified. Then I saw you, and I promised myself that if I could just get up, I'd walk over to you... I'd tell you how much I need you and how much I want you... and how nothing else matters." - Nathan

Now I've just come to realize that having all the material things I want isn't enough to keep me happy. I have a phone that can store almost everything that I need, a desknote that I've set-up to suit my taste, an iPod to keep me going, a camera that I bring everywhere to store so many memories, and the speakers that I wanted. I don't really so much material things, in fact this is just a little craze to me.

This is such a crazy day - there's just something wrong with it and I couldn't figure what it is. I've been thinking but my mind seems to be so blank. Alot of thoughts are rushing in and out of my brain, that I don't know which one to focus on. It's really a complicated thing.

One thing i'm sure about... I need some form of distraction, just to keep me off this silent phase. I need someone to talk to - random thoughts, or some form of activity that I could get myself busy with. Silence bothers me so much, and the word sleep hasn't been entering my vocabulary lately.

I can't wait for my OTH DVD. When you think about it, there are alot of lessons that you could get from OTH - & that's why I love it so much.

Somehow, I wish that I could turn back time and would've said yes to everything that I wanted. But then again, sometimes, wanting more could mean losing everything. Regrets? I'm not so sure.