Everything...

I don't know what's going on, why everything is going this way & not that way. Some things suck, while some don't. It's really a bitch... I mean, why can't everything just be good? Have I had enough of my good times? Did I not cherish those moments? If this is a part of growing up, then let's all be immature & be happy. I miss old times, when everything seemed so perfect.

Again, I found something meaningful but how come other things that matter doesn't seem to go well? Do good things really go with something bad? It just sucks :(

I'm happy now, but then some things make me sad too. A lot of things actually. & it's not ordinary sadness, it's close to an extreme cos somethings are at risk & those things matter.

Recently, when I'm lonely... there's just no one to run to. Someone who I can talk to about anything and everything without feeling a little weird. I miss having someone to wake up right in the middle of the night, & just rant to. & eventually that person could make me laugh, smile or something. I miss having someone close. :(

This sucks big time..

Change, I know it's something constant but I don't think I have it right now. Everything seems to be like steadily sad or screwed up. I miss change, that is if change's going to do me better.

Darn. I sound shitty like a 5 year old begging for a bar of chocolate. Although, this is different. I'm a 17 year old neurotic, craving for attention & love.